I’ve been struggling a lot lately with body image,
confidence, and “loving yourself.” All
of this isn’t new but after spending a few years skinny, this re-gain is causing
some havoc on my mental state. I have
two photos that were taken a day a part.
In one I think I look good and in the other I wished I looked
better.
In the first photo, I think my overall confidence at the
start of the day was low. I had an awards
ceremony to attend as I was getting my 10-year ISP certificate. I had just bought this sweater from Old Navy
and though it might camouflage the overhang on my work slacks more than my
usual polo shirt does. I knew I’d be
seeing people I’ve not seen in a while and I knew I would be having my photo
taken. I am in desperate need of a hair
cut so I’m also having some bad hair-day issues.
In the second photo, I know my overall confidence was
better than the day before in the photo above.
I have just bought better fitting jeans so I don’t have the
overhang. I knew I could wear my sparkly
swoop neck shirt since I didn’t have the overhang and I also had my longer
sweater to balance it all out. I was
having an awesome hair day too!
I suppose as a woman, I have the ability to pick apart a
photo. We all know that with photos
there is lighting, angles, and even photo shop programs that can turn any awful
photo into a wonderful one. It is hard
accepting yourself when you feel you don’t look good in a photo. Or worse yet it is easy to avoid photos all
together. I know the reason for my
feelings is tied to the weight gain and the ill-fitting clothes. It’s really hard to break out of the negative
cycle.
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