Do You Like Seeing Your Calories?

When you dine at a restaurant, do you like having the nutritional information right in front of you? 

On my recent trip to Panera Bread I instantly noticed the calorie count was listed right there on the menu.  Under normal circumstances (i.e. when I am actually tracking and paying attention to what I am eating) I would find that helpful.  However, there are those other circumstances (i.e. not actually tracking and/or wanting to splurge) that I have no desire to see those large calorie numbers staring at me.  It is as if I’m being watched by the WW Gods to make sure I chose wisely.

When it comes to splurging, there is nothing about choosing wisely.

I remember feeling this same when we were on vacation.  We were in an airport somewhere and decided on what to eat.  I thought California Pizza Kitchen sounded good until I stepped up to the menu and saw the calories listed.  I thought “well that is a bummer.  I’m on vacation!  I don’t care about calories.”

Now you see why I always gain weight on vacation eh?

On a normal circumstance I do like knowing the NI in advance.  I think it is helpful in making a healthier decision.  Obviously calories don’t tell the full story of a food but in a pinch it is better than nothing.  I prefer to know the PPVs before I eat a food vs. after.  

Unless, of course, I’m splurging.

The Hips Don't Lie

I am fully aware I stole this blog title from a Shakira song.

In May I made an appointment with the St. Alphonsus Spine Center to discuss my back issues and get another opinion.  That resulted in another round of PT, which I had four visits in June.  My back was feeling pretty good up until the 150^th Celebration where the doctor says "I had an exasperation” that would take 10-14 days to clam back down.  In the meantime she suggested going back to PT for some refresh sessions.

I had not planned to quit going to PT per se.  Yes, my back was feeling better and after four visits I actually had virtually no pain.  However, my work shift changed and I was now only off during the day on Mondays.  We have a rotating schedule where I work one Monday a month, which complicates things even more.  It has been hard to get in for an appointment. 

When I was going to PT in June we discussed my poor hip alignment and once she was able to get that straightened out (pun intended) I felt tons better.  I knew immediately when my pain came back that my hips were again out of alignment.  And boy were they out of alignment, my left one was worse than my right one.  She was able to get me fixed up but the fix was only temporary.  As much as I try to keep things aligned my body just doesn’t want to cooperate. 

My body really likes its old bad behaviors. 

I told my Mom on the phone that my hips' comfort zone is my body's UNcomfort zone. 

Sadly, I was not able to get an appointment today since I am working but I’ve got one schedule for next Monday.  I’m not sleeping very good since Saturday and my hip pain is pretty bad.  I just hate how uncomfortable it is when sleeping/rolling over.  My cleep is pretty poor these days.  It doesn’t help that I also have more around my middle than in the past. 

Sigh.

If it isn’t one thing it’s another eh?  There will always be something that gets in the way of our goals.  You just gotta be stronger than whatever it is and continue to power through to the best of your ability.

Single Day Weekend

I am working today in exchange for taking Tuesday off.  It was a last minute switch and I am so thankful for helpful coworkers!

Since I am working today my only day off was Saturday.  So, what does a one-day-weekend look like?

Friday night I met friends for a bite to eat and a movie downtown.  Boise Classic Movies is an organization that brings classic movies (aka old movies) back for a showing on the big screen.  Friday night was Greese.  It was an interesting experience and we had a lot of fun.  They have a costume contest ahead of time and then people are singing, talking, and reciting lines during the movie.  We have plans to try and hit The Princess Bride when it comes in August.

The movie was at The Egyptian Theatre.  It is an old style two-story movie theater and I’ve only been inside a handful of times.  It sure does make for a more enjoyable classic movie feel too.

 

I had plans to hike Table Rock and take Rebecca out for a birthday breakfast at Goldy’s.  She wasn’t feeling well so we cancelled.  I was sort of happy because my hips/back did not really want an intense hike.  Obviously I did no other planned activity as I am 1) lazy and 2) had a million things to do.  I met Kenyon for breakfast at Cracker Barrel then spent $42 at Trader Joe’s.  I love TJ’s.  It’s like Disneyland…but with food.  I went mostly for cottage cheese (they have the best) and using the WW app was able to find lots of SF food options to buy.  I also hit up Costco and Winco.

I had an appointment to take off my gel nails.  I really like them and they look really great, until they break.  It has been happening each time I get them done and I am tired of wasting money.  A little birdie told me my nail person would be quitting to as she is moving to NV so it was sort of an easy decision to stop getting my nails done.  The money can be used elsewhere so it is the right decision.  From there I had a pedicure appointment at the Avadea Institute.  I had some fun new sandals due to arrive at my door (free shipping from The Walking Company) so I needed to pretty up my toes.  The Avadea Institute is a school so it was a fraction of the cost and I brought my own no-light gel polish.

I bought two different colors of the same sandal before I bought the flip/flop kind.  I know I’m keeping the flip flop one and the silver pair.  I am not sure yet if I should keep the pink/purple pair.  It is cute…but do I really need three?

 

Kenyon works every other Saturday night so I made plans for the same group of ladies (minus a few and adding one) to come over and play some games at my house.  I kept it easy with this recipe for fajitas.  It was really tasty and not very complicated so I would make it again for sure.  I’m having left over fajitas for lunch today.

I didn’t snap any photos of last night’s get together.  We had a lot of fun and played three games: Would You Rather?, which was really hard, and UNO Spin, which was really fun, and Apples to Apples, which I really liked.  We are going to see if we can get a group together to try Cards Against Humanity, which is supposed to be really great.

It was an enjoyable day off and now I’m back at it.  I’m a bit sleepy though….zzzzz…..

Motivation

My buddy Dave from our 100+ Maintainers Maintainers thread shred with us an exercise where you use the letters in your name to list goals and/or list reasons why weight loss and maintenance are important.  I really liked this idea.  After doing some thinking, here is what I came up with:

 

Learn to accept what you see in the mirror

Increase activity.  Move that body!

No going back

Don’t engage in negative self talk

Stay the course

Accountability! Track 100%

You CAN do this!

When All Signs Point To No

Good Morning.  I totally thought it was Friday when I woke up. 

 

 

Then I realized it was Thursday and I still had two days left this week.

 

Well bummer!

So here I am on a Thursday and not Friday.  We have been busy this morning at work.

Do you ever have one of those incidences where all signs point to NO and yet you do it anyway?  That happened to me last night.

I had stayed later than expected at our final wrap-up reunion planning meeting from our big 150^th celebration a few weeks ago.  My cousin Ann brought tri-tip and it took FOREVER to cook/make dinner.  So I didn’t end up leaving Murphy to close to 8:30pm and it is an hour drive at least.  Ugh.

That feeling of wanting dessert set in as I was leaving the ranch.  I knew it would as I’d had a very high-caloric-taste-bud-enticing meal and I always want to follow that up with dessert.  I was trying really hard to prep myself to just go home.  I chewed some gum and thought about driving around the Arctic Circle (as in taking a detour, not driving around and around in the parking lot).  I finally convinced myself to drive by and see how long the drive-thru line was. 

The drive-thru line was ridiculously long, however, there looked to be nobody inside waiting to order.  Score!  I made my turn into the main parking lot to then tried to turn into the Arctic Circle parking lot but the cars from the drive-thru were blocking the entrance.  This was very rude and inconvenient.  Of course I still parked, just on the other side of the building, and went inside to order my Reeses Peanut Butter Cup shake.

Warning flag number one was driving by Arctic Circle.  Warning flag number two was not leaving once the entrance was blocked.  Warning flag number three…

…I hit EVERY red light driving home.  All eleven of them.

Ugh.

Why when all signs point to one direction do we feel the need to travel another direction?  To add insult to injury the shake wasn’t as good as usual as it was lacking large chunks of Reeses.  So stopping at eating only half was pretty easy.

Sigh.

Track it and move on.  Today is a new day (which is not Friday).

Double Date At PF Chang

Happy Wednesday, half way through the work week.

I had a great time last night meeting up with my friend Jenny and her boyfriend Noel.  It was wonderful to meet Noel and I can’t believe it has been six months since they started dating.  The dinner at PF Chang was delicious, however, the air conditioner had died prior to our visit and it was HOT.  If I’m hot I know my husband is dying as he is always hot and I am always cold.

I pre-planned some main dish ideas ahead of time but I wasn’t sure if I would partake in a cocktail or not.  Jenny and I were both asking each other if we were going to order a drink.  I asked her, “should I be social and get a glass of wine or should I be a dud and just drink water?”  She suggested ordering a glass of wine.  The WW-er in me knew that would just be extra PPVs but honesty, I love the social aspect of having a drink with friends.  I don’t drink at home and since Kenyon doesn’t drink we don’t go out much socially in these types of settings.  I absolutely loved having another couple to have a double date with.  It was so much fun.  Part of that is social and drinking.  I will always be at odds with what I “should” do and what I “want” to do.

The want side of me won and I ordered a glass of wine.  It was the right decision, even though it cost me another 5 PPVs.

Noel made a joke at the exact time Kenyon was going to take our photo.  My lovely husband snapped the photo anyway.  Thanks Kenyon.  I can always count on you for the money shot!

Kenyon has a shellfish allergy and I knew that some of the sauces have oyster sauce.  We discussed this with the waiter and he brought over a menu with some “safe” items to eat.  Kenyon ordered his dish and I ordered mine (I didn’t really want what he ordered).  I went for the Ginger Chicken and Broccoli along with a small side of the Spicy Green Beans.  I had a little bit of brown rice as well.  It was delicious.

I picked out the broccoli and ate half the chicken so I’ve got chicken left over as well as some brown rice for another meal.  I would order the Ginger Chicken again.  The whole dish is 11 PPVs.

I used 18 PPVs at dinner and I had 15 DPA left so I used 3 WPPA.  I had walked in the treadmill at work over an hour and 2.33 miles.  I earned 2 APs.  By the end of my day I was again over 10,000 steps.  This makes three days in a row.  I’ve got my tennis shoes here at work and am sitting on the side of the room with the treadmill so I’m going for day four of 10,000 steps.

Monday On A Tuesday

Good Morning.  I’m starting my work week off today.  Yeeeehaaaaw.

I took a two hour nap yesterday afternoon.  It wasn’t quite planned and I knew it might mess with my early bedtime.  However, with Kenyon on night shift and me on day shift it is quite tempting to snuggle whenever he is in bed.  I was tired so it didn’t take long to fall asleep.  After my nap I made some sloppy joe lentils for dinner and prepped my lunch for today (taco salad).  I’ll post the recipe for sloppy joe lentils soon.

Since I napped I stayed up to watch The Bachelorette.  This season is an interesting one and despite all the cliff hangers and the craziness, I still faithfully watch each week.  One of the guys I was rooting for was eliminated.  I didn’t see Kaitlyn with him but I was still rooting for him.  I don’t really have a favorite this season and it will be interesting to see what ends up happening.  This is one crazy season!

On Sunday at work I walked on our console treadmill for 2.5 miles.  You have to walk a slow pace in order to talk on the radio, use the left mouse for the radio (since you can’t use the foot pedal), the right mouse for the computer, and also type.  Then if you have to use the phone it is a bit of reach.  After using it on Sunday though I am much more comfortable though and I packed my tennis shoes with plans to walk today at work.  

On Sunday my FitBit hit 10,000 steps.  Yeah!  A normal workday with not activity is 2,500 steps.  On Monday the WW leader gave me a suggestion to walk forward/backwards in front of the TV.  I logged 45 minutes of TV watching/walking and also earned 10,000 steps at the end of my day. 

I had a great day of eating yesterday and was able to do all SF and used 4 WPPA.  I have plans to meet a friend and her newish boyfriend (I’ve not met him yet) at PF Chang.  I did some looking at the nutrition and wrote down the PPVs for some dishes. 

Either I’ll share a dish with Kenyon or plan to talk half home.  I know for sure I’m ordering the spicy green beans.  They are my favorite when I go to a couple of our Chinese buffets in the area.  A small order is 4 PPVs.  I am looking forward to the evening and the company as well as the atmosphere.  We never really go out to eat downtown and although tomorrow is a work day I am still looking forward to our double date.

Overwhelmed

I had a good (ugly) cry at my WW meeting today. I was very theraputic and my WW meeting is a safe place to let that all out. The leader hugged me and everybody was very supportive. There was even a nun in our meeting, a new member in our group.

I've been pretty emotional since Friday. What set it all off was clothes shopping. I suppose you could say I've come full circle. After I lost 130 pounds clothing shopping became very overwhelming. I had not had such a large amount of clothes available to me in a very long time. I loved that I could fit into a size 12/14 and a size M/L and that there was so many cute styles. I didn't know what fit my body and struggled when I was shopping. Eventually I stopped taking in two sizes into the dressing room (the one I really needed and the one size larger that I thought I needed). I dressed in more form fitting clothes and I no longer wanted to hide under baggy shirts. I had a closet full of cute clothes and no worry that it wouldn't fit from year to year and season to season.

Clothes shopping on Friday was not so carefree. Once again it is overwhelming. I don't fit into a size 12 anymore and size 14 is hit and miss. I really am a size 16 and a size XL now. It is hard to stomach (literally as my stomach is the issue here) and very frustrating. When I do try on clothes they don't really look good. I zone right in on my muffin top and overhang. I now want to hide behind baggy clothes or find shirts that are more “flow-y” and less tight. The dress department at JC Penney sits right next to the plus size department. I kept looking over there thinking “this can't be it again. This can't be where I am at and what it has come to. I can't be at a point where I am shopping in the plus size clothing department again.” Clothes shopping isn't fun anymore.

Needless to say I have been in a pretty bad funk since Friday. I met Mom on Saturday and we went to Kohl's where I found some work slacks in a size 16 that have some give to the waist. I do hope better fitting clothes (i.e. better looking clothes) will make me feel better. I've still not found many tops though as this season seems to be a lot of sleeveless. It wasn't until I was at the mall again today realizing that I'm trying to hide my body where I once took pride in it.

I've blogged before that living in the in-between is difficult. Those negative thoughts of not being at goal taunt me. It was suggested today in my meeting that I change my focus to better fitting clothes. Since this seems to be what is causing my perma-bad-mood that sounds like a good idea. I will push past this. I always do.

Besides the clothing issue my back has been hurting really bad since last Saturday. I am not sleeping well and I am tired all the time. I have no desire to exercise. I kept my food on track up until Friday and despite having a few days of interesting food choices I had a loss of 0.4 pounds today at the WW scale. I am happy the alternative didn't happen and I ended up with a huge gain. That surely would have been the icing on the cake, which would have tasted horrible instead of delicious wonderful icing.

I went back to PT today. It was a difficult decision since it costs a small fortune. I feel better with PT and I know after this last week that my hips are once again out of alignment. I did too much last Saturday at the 150^th Celebration and my body reverted back to its comfort zone, which is very uncomfortable for me. I hope with some additional PT visits, keeping up with it at home, and getting back into exercise again will help.

I'll get past this. It is great to have such a nice support network between the WW leaders, members, and my online WW buddies. We are all human. We all struggle. It isn't a matter of if you will struggle but when you will struggle. It is all a part of the journey and when we come out the other side, perhaps battered and bruised, we learn that what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger.

Thanks for letting me share.

Happy Father's Day Plus Saturday Ins And Outs

Good Morning and Happy Father’s Day to all the wonderful men out there who are, or are considered to be, a father.  You play a special role in a child’s life.  I hope you enjoy your special day.  I am lucky to have a wonderful father, grandfather, and father-in-law in my life.  We will celebrate later today with dessert at my grandparent’s house.

I am sorry I didn’t check in with you yesterday.  I am sort of in a bit of a funk.  I think I’ll write more of what has been going on inside my head later this week.  Still sorting out the feelings and in the meantime trying to stay on track.  After a few meals out and some less-than-stellar eating, I prepared a healthy meal last night and also prepared leftovers to bring to work today for my overtime shift.  I’m working hard to adjust my attitude.

I saw two hot air balloons out on Saturday

Since I was having some “down feelings” on Friday and just feeling frumpy I knew I needed to get to aWW meeting on Saturday morning.  My hopes were to be able to see Donna, who works as the receptionist on Saturdays at the meeting by my house.  I woke up at 6am and sent Kenyon a text, which was just getting off work, to see if he wanted to go to breakfast.  I am fully aware that negative feelings + eating out = disaster and yet I really wanted to meet for breakfast.  Thankfully Kenyon is an easy sell so we met at The Original Pancake House for a bite to eat.  On a side note, the lady at the restaurant commented on our matching personalized license plates saying it was “very cute.”  Yes, we are one of those couples!

While my thought process, along with some lingering negative feeling, told me pancakes would make me feel better, the conscious side of my brain told me that probably wasn’t the best remedy.  I know the pancakes at OPH are good so yesterday I went for the home style potatoes instead with my eggs and bacon.  They have the BEST bacon at OPH.  Go there…stat!

Don't worry, I shared my bacon and potatoes with Kenyon

I was a little late to the WW meeting and was sad to see there was no Donna to be found.  Since she works every other Saturday, yesterday was not her day to work.  I sat in the back row of the meeting but I just feel “off” the entire five minutes I was there.  So I left.  Sigh.

I’ll tell ya, this funk I am in isn’t pretty.

I had plans to go to the Farmer’s Market to kill some time and get in a forced walk at the same time.  I also wanted to pick up a fresh homemade pie for our Father’s Day dessert.  A nap sounded sooooo good and I almost skipped my downtown adventures.  Thankfully I wised up, got ready for the day, and headed downtown.  I had plans after to meet my Mom in Nampa.

Downtown was BUSY.  I wasn’t aware there were so many things going on, including Boise Pride.  I would have loved to stay and watch the Pride Parade but I had already made plans with my Mom.  I walked to the Capitol just before the rally started.  It was really neat to see the steps of the Capitol decked out in rainbow.  You don’t see that very often in Idaho.

 

I swing by Flying M for coffee on my way out of town.  They were also showing their Pride support with these adorable cookies.

 

The guy behind the counter had a shirt on that said “proud to be an IDAHOmo”. Ha.  Loved it!

I met Mom in Nampa for some errands and to try out the new Paniera Bread.  I’ve never been to one despite all our travels.  It was really good and I’ll be back for sure.  Fresh baked bread = Heaven!  Mom and I split two different sandwiches and really liked both of them.

 

I’m at work today on overtime, despite the extra money already being spent.  Doh!  I’ve been on a bit of a spending kick lately.  Need to rein that in.