I thought I would share a little with you of how I am feeling lately.
After I was able to get my WI forJune done, my motivation seemed to dwindle. I am in a pretty big funk right now. I was feeling a bit bummed on Tuesday since I felt like I had a great week but didn’t really get much validation from the scale. Don’t get me wrong, I am thrilled that I am free for another month. I just seemed to have lost my “umph.”
I am not sure exactly why these feeling have set in. My WW leader has been gone for the last four weeks since she had knee surgery. While the leader filling in is great, I am wondering if I am feeling a bit in limbo since Donna isn’t there. I also realized we are eight weeks into our 10 week shift rotation. at work I like being on day shift and I like that Kenyon and I are working the same shift. However, I also know that after about eight weeks I am ready for something new. I could be feeling some of that too as it has happened before.
Regardless, I am not feeling like my usual self. I don’t want to end up with a huge gain either so I must still try to stay somewhat focused.
I have not been feeling like meal planning or cooking. Kenyon and I have been eating out quite a bit. This is not only causing a strain on our wallets but can also cause a strain on our waist. Since we have been eating out more, I am not allowing myself to go off the deep end.
We went to Golden Corral on Wednesday. I decided before we went that I would have either a roll or a dessert, but not both. When we arrived I saw they had hush puppies (my favorite!!!) on the buffet line so I opted for some of those instead of a roll or a dessert. I didn’t even walk near the dessert area as I just didn’t need the temptation. Same thing happened on Thursday when I went to SouperSalad for lunch and Cracker Barrel for dinner. I did not have any ice cream or dessert when I finished my meal.
Trust me, I was not really depriving myself either. Tuesday I had a Reeses Peanut Butter Cup shake and since we had to wait a while for our order she gave me a medium instead of small. "I won't eat it all." Yeah right. Why do you think I only get a small? Too good to stop!
Anyway, yesterday was National Donut Day. I learned this when I got to work and a coworker went to get two dozen donuts from a local bakery. Nothing smells better than freshly made donuts and boy did they smell good! As I mentioned above, I had held my resolve and didn’t partake in dessert the last two days. Sure, I could have had a donut if I wanted to, with the way I am feeling right now I know sugar isn’t the answer. I also didn’t want to spend the PPVs for a donut that won’t hold me over or do anything for my hunger. It was a tough decision every time I looked at or got a whiff of those donuts. No wonder they have their own national day. Delicious!
It is funny because last week’s meeting topic was emotional eating and I feel like I am holding my own against that this week more so than last week. I am not usually an emotional eater. However, when I get into a mood I can sure do some damage!
I am also lacking the motivation for exercise. I did not do any formal exercise from Sunday to Wednesday. I didn’t feel like going to my usual class at the Y on Tuesday. Wednesday I had good intentions of working out before my overtime shift. The time got changed last minute and I opted for eating out over activity when I got home from work. Thursday at least produced some activity! I had planned to meet a friend for a walk in the park and then go to my class at the Y. I was already talking myself out of going to the Y when I met my friend. The internal battle took place and I decided to just go home after our walk. A bit of guilt set in as well.
I hope this mood will pass soon. In the meantime, I need to stay mindful and not use this as an excuse to be careless.