Scenic Flight

I had the opportunity yesterday to take a scenic flight in a very tiny plane.

This guy that works at Kenyon’s company was looking for somebody to split the cost of fuel as he works to build up his flight hours.  Kenyon possesses a huge interest in flying.  When he first told me about this I wasn’t about the squash his excitement despite being extremely nervous.  I was a huge ball of nerves the first time he and this guy went on their first flight.  I don’t like the thought of Kenyon risking his life without me at least there right along with him.  To ease my nervous energy Kenyon suggested I tag along on the next flight. 

We met Rob near the Boise Airport for our scenic flight.  I chose to fly over Silver City so I could see our tiny town from the air (which was really tiny from that altitude).  We loaded up in the small four seat Cessna plane.  This was only my second time ever being in a small plane and this one was even smaller than the sea plane I rode in during our vacation to Coeur d’ Alene last year.

Once we were loaded up and Rob went through his flight checklist he explained to me where I find the motion sickness bags and that if we run into any problems "we will just open the windows and coast back down."  GULP!  (that is when I tightened my seatbelt a bit tighter).

We got the approval from air traffic control and we were off.

I have only been on the back side of the airport one other time.  A few years ago we took a scenic helicopter flight to look at Christmas lights.  It is a very different feeling being out on the tamarack in a small plane.  We passed a large UPS plane being loaded.

Goodbye Boise Airport, see you soon.

Once we got up and off the ground Rob let Kenyon take the controls.  He was all smiles.

Since I requested to fly over Silver City we first had to pass Murphy.  If Rob had not pointed out our landmarks I wouldn’t have known this tiny town was Murphy. 

We had to increase our elevation and fly up and over the mountains to see Silver City.  There was snow on them there hills.

Finally Kenyon spotted Silver City.  Again, had you not pointed it out I would have missed it. 

I tried to zoom in to our cabin.  It is the last house on the bottom center of this photo. 

And with that we turned around and headed back to Boise.

I’ve been dispatching for eight years now and while I do enjoy some aspects of my job there is no way I could ever dispatch for air traffic control.  As we headed back to Boise there was a runway down.  Talk about complications.  At least with my job when the road is blocked cars can just sit and wait.   You can’t do that in the air.

We got the okay to bring our tiny plane in and we landed safely on the ground.

I had a lot of fun and it was a really neat experience.  It makes me a little less nervous having Kenyon go out on future flights.  I, however, will keep my feet firmly planted on the ground.  At least for now.

Am I Really A Failure?

I had an email conversation with my fellow WW board member and friend about feelings of failure for not being at WW’s goal weight.

It is no surprise that anytime a person sets out on a weight loss journey their self worth is gauged by the number on the scale.  While it is only one form of measurement of success, WW members often give A LOT of power to the scale and the number it reads each week.  (We give it so much power that A LOT needed to be written in all caps!)

Living in the spotlight after accomplishing a large weight loss holds a heavy burden.  While it might not actually be that people are judging you, it can feel that way.  Mentally you can feel like all eyes are on you.  If for some reason you gain some of your weight back your mind can make you think those eyes are saying, “here is where she gains all her weight back like she has a zillion times before.

This is my first successful venture at a weight loss over 100 pounds.  I have no prior experiences with losing that much weight or attempting to keep it off.  I have always been very open about my weight loss and maintenance.  Being in the spotlight during my weight loss journey, and being the only person as at my meetings that lost such a large amount, causes people to look to you for advise and encouragement.  Hey, if you did it than so can they.

I have also been very open and honest with re-gain and I used to feel the need to explain while I was no longer under my goal weight.  I now feel the need to explain why I am not at my goal weight.  Is it really necessary to explain why I am not at goal?  Nope.  So why do I feel the need to do so?

I think it stems from the worry that those who looked up to you and turned to you for support will now think I am a failure.  But I’m not a failure so why do I believe they will think I am? 

Failure is defined by Wikipedia as: “the state or condition of not meeting a desirable or intended objective, and may be viewed as the opposite of success.”

I think this definition really explains what my friend is feeling.  She knows she isn’t a failure yet her mind makes her feel that way.  Because she isn’t at her desirable or intended objective (i.e. WW’s goal weight) she is viewing her success as a failure.  But I see no failure.  If the whole purpose was to lose weight, which she has done, and keep it off, which she has also done, then there is no failure.

So how do we get past these thoughts of failure?  We have to adjust our thinking. 

The mental aspect of weight loss can take a while to catch up.  The same is true for acceptance of not being at your goal weight.  We need to work really hard to squash this stigma that weight gain after a large weight loss is bad.  It isn’t bad….it is just life!  It happens sometimes.  There is no shame in it.  Keeping off a large amount of weight is tough.  If we were suddenly cured of all our food issues once we got to goal than we wouldn’t have been fat to begin with.

For anybody out there struggling with the number on the scale please try and cut yourself some slack.  Try to look at the big pictures.  Has your heath improved?  Are you out walking a long distance?  Are you now a runner?  Do you sleep better?  Are you happier?  Are you better off than where you started?

I’ll leave you with some wise words from Bill Cosby.

Almost Friday

It is almost my Friday.  I have to work a full 10 hour overtime shift on Wednesday.  Then, I get to enjoy a few days of fun and activity.

Tomorrow Kenyon and I have plans to take a scenic flight on a small plane.  This will only be the second time I will have been on a tiny plane.  Kenyon is really interest in flying and found a guy at work that wanted to split the cost of fuel as he works to meet the requirements for his flight hours.  I have been asked to go along on this flight.

I’m excited and also nervous.  I think I’m less nervous going with Kenyon vs when he goes alone.  I am more nervous when he is without me as I would not want to live the rest of my life without him if something was to happen.

I requested we fly over Silver City so I can see the town from the air.  We will see what plans transpire.  It should be fun none the less.

I will have to miss my WW meeting though.  I am going to check in with my scale at home in the morning so I can get an idea of the damage I’ve done this week.  I think this will help snap me out of my funk.  I am also looking forward to a new week with new WPPAs.  I know when I get off track I need to right things ASAP.  But that isn’t so easy sometimes.  I always feel renewed when a new WW week starts. 

I do wish I had the energy of my meeting, leader, and members to also help me re-focus this week.  I am not going to cancel on this scenic flight just because I could use a WW meeting.  I will attend Dawny’s meeting on Saturday in Spokane so it will be great to meet some new people that way.

I am feeling better so I just need to make the best food choices I can this week.  I might need to go back to taking food photos.  That for sure helps keep me accountable.

I'm In A Weird Mental Place Right Now

I posted this on the WW message boards this morning:

I got up at 3:30am to hit up the treadmill. 

My food last night was less-than-par.  It might have been borderline out of control.  I had the thought this morning that I needed to “workout harder/faster/longer." 

But, that would also be counterproductive.  Therefore, I just clean it up from here.  I'm in a weird mental gap lately.

I really am in some sort of weird mental gap this week.  I just can’t seem to shake it and I’m not sure what is causing it.  I have been reckless with my calories many times before and it doesn’t feel quite like that.  It isn’t like I want to be out of control either.  I just can’t seem to focus this week. 

I tried to talk myself out of eating out last night.  I didn’t meal plan this week so food at home sounds boring.  But, there was a plan for last night’s dinner.  I got my hair done after work and knew it would be an easy-to-prepare dinner.  The thought of eating out was on my mind all day.  I know I’m craving veggies right now and a salad bar sounded really good.  However, SouperSalad or something like that didn’t sound good.  I suddenly wanted salad AND pizza.  I wanted lots of salad and a little bit of pizza.  It didn’t take much to convince Kenyon to meet met for pizza after he got off work.  After all, I was buying!

I got to Flying Pie Pizza early so I could put our order in and started in on my salad bar.  They have a really great salad bar and that is why I picked that place.  They were missing the pineapple though.  I love pineapple on my salad.  Since I was having pizza I kept my toppings to zero PPV veggies.  On my second salad bar trip I added in a few garbanzo beans and olives.

I debated on which pizza to order as I really like the one that comes with smoked Gouda, which is twice as tempting.  Kenyon wanted a 12 inch pizza and that was $8 more than the 10 inch.  I rationalized that we would get two 10 inch pizzas instead, and I could have my yummy smoked Gouda.  The pizza was delicious and my taste buds were happy.  I had a second trip to the salad bar (very small plates) and that also made my taste buds happy.

It all went a bit downhill from there.  I have this bad habit of wanting sweets after eating out.  I should have tried harder to squash the thoughts that started to enter my head of a Reese’s Peanut Butter shake from Arctic Circle.  I rationalized that I only needed a few bites.  And boy, those few bites were exactly what I did need.

The part above about “borderline out of control” is that my shake experience didn’t end at just a few bites and quickly I knew I had eaten too much.  I flat out just didn’t feel well a short time after.  I still don’t feel really well this morning either. 

I’m not really dealing with guilt feelings.  I ate it and I enjoyed it.  I pretty much just wiped out my WPPAs but it was worth it.  I think not feeling well is what made me think that I needed to exercise really hard this morning.  Yeah, that didn’t happen. 

I know this too shall pass.  I just really hope I don’t do too much damage in the meantime!

Missing: Food Fotos

Good Morning.  I hope your Saturday is off to a good start.  So far we have dry skies so that is nice.  It is a bit windy and brisk on the temperature front though. 

You might have noticed I didn’t post any food photos this week.  My reasons for not taking food photos didn’t coincide with my less-than-stellar eating habits last week.  I had forgotten to take a photo of my food on both Wednesday and Thursday and by Friday morning I reached for my iPhone to snap my breakfast and thought “I’m taking a break this week.” 

Now, in hindsight knowing my food week was rough I wish I had taken photos.  It would have shown you some really honest food tracking.

Why can it be so hard to be honest with our food tracking?  We live in a society where it is “bad” to want something unhealthy.  Food shouldn't make us feel guilty.  We give food way too much credit!

My theory is if it tastes good then how can it be bad?

I’m kidding. 

The topic in the WW meetings this week was Enjoy Every Bite.  I can’t say I enjoyed every bite of my undocumented week last week.  I have had the weirdest appetite lately so I have just been going with the flow.  I do like to enjoy my food and I do strive to eat foods that make my taste buds happy.

This week I also didn’t feel like taking food photos so I won't have anything to share with you next week.  I just feel like my food is really boring lately.  I didn’t meal plan this week and I’ve been relying on WW frozen meals for easy convenience.  Not having a solid food plan also makes eating out much more appealing.  I will do a good amount of eating out next week when I travel to Spokane so I need to keep it at bay for the moment.

I’m not sure if I’ll resume food photos or not.  Sometimes it feels exhausting and sometimes I enjoy sharing my food with you.  I don’t want you to think that because the photos stop I’m out eating Taco Bell and Pizza Hut, both of which I did actually eat last week. 

I’m still working my way to goal and being honest with my tracking is one very important way I’ll get there.

 

This N' That

Good Morning!!

We have had rain the past few days.  I know rain is good and that we need it after our mild winter.  It rained so much on Tuesday we had a few new friends show up in our yard.

 

Today starts my work week and while I spent a lot of time resting and sleeping on my days off, I don’t quite feel refreshed.  I actually started my work week a little early yesterday by helping our new trooper recruits. 

It is Officer Safety Week at ISP and I am working in the Mobile Command Center (MCC) a few hours a day to dispatch for our new recruits as they make fake traffic stops on the training track.  It is always fun to dispatch in the MCC. 

 

I will be in Spokane next week and am looking forward to my trip.  I will be meeting my friend Dawny for the first time, in person!!  For those of us on the WW message boards, it is quite exciting to meet somebody in real life.  I have known Dawny for quite some time now as she is a part of our 100+ Maintainers daily thread.  We started emailing one-on-one a short time later and now have become really great friends often sending emails and texts all day long.  I am so excited to finally meet and I also get to attend her WW meeting and meet her WW peeps.  WhooooHoooo!

The other part of my trip is to walk the Bloomsday 12K in Spokane.  I have heard a lot of great stuff about this race and I am excited to join Dawny as we walk it together.  I had not planned to take this last week off exercise though.  After all the walking Kenyon and I did in Vegas it makes me feel very confident about walking the 12K distance.  However, there are a few nasty hills on this course.  I need to get out for at least a few short walks this week.  My legs will be a bit worse for the wear if I don’t get moving!

Thankfully I’m feeling better so I’ll give it a go. 

Happy Friday.

Last Week's Sad Activity

My FitBit totals were quite generous considering I haven't done any formal activity all week.

64,652 steps and 27.92 steps

This weekly total includes Vegas walking Monday and Tuesday and despite driving all day Wednesday I still logged quite a few steps. Friday was the only day I exercised last week. The-cold-that-will-not-go-away settled in on Friday and exercise took a back seat the rest of last week.

Wednesday: Driving home from Vegas

Not activity today. We walked to the nearby hotel/casino for the breakfast buffet but that was about it for APs today.

Thursday: Aunt Barb in town

My aunt was here from CO and this was my only day to spend time with her. No formal APs but I was on my feet a good amount of the day.

Friday: 2.5 miles on the treadmill

I got up at 3:30am to start my usual treadmill activity. I earned 3 APs. That was it for the week.

Saturday – Tuesday: No activity

I went to work all week and went to bed early each night. I had no energy for activity and also had really bad chest congestion. Tuesday was my first of two days off this week. After my WW meeting I came home and took a nap, watched a lot of TV, and went to bed.

I hope to get back to activity soon. I know I need those APs for my calorie deficit. Plus, I am just ready to start feeling better again.

Weekly WI

My goal after returning from Vegas was to get the vacation weight off so I was at least at the same weight at WW when I last did my WI two weeks ago. I knew it was going to be a tough week. On the road trip home from Vegas Wednesday I used up a good amount of my WPPAs. Thursday was egg dying with my nieces and dinner at my sister's house. Friday was National Telecommunications Week and breakfast provided by the brass. Saturday was an early Easter dinner at my parent's house. I was in for a very busy week and my WPPAs were diminishing FAST.

I had not also foreseen that on Friday I would come down with the worst cold I have had in a very long time, which I am still not quite over yet. That put a kink into last week's activity in that I have not worked out all week and I think my daily FitBit total has not even hit 2,000 steps.

My food was all over the place. I didn't have much of an appetite yet it seemed to be easy to eat the left over sweets from the NTW breakfast. The leftover food was hanging around the break room and despite the cinnamon pecan coffee cake being dried out and crusty I couldn't keep my hands from picking out the cinnamon and pecan bits. I stopped tracking all together on Friday. I was already way over my PPVs and the ship was sinking fast.

When it came time to step on the scale yesterday I was a bit fearful. I even considered skipping the scale and just going to my meeting. When I stepped on the scale at home that morning to “assess the damage” I was hopeful that I would at least be the weight I was when I returned from Vegas. Even that little bit of a loss was better than a really huge loss. Obviously, we never know what our bodies will do as I ended up with a 0.6 pound loss.

Actual weight was 181.4 

I'm not quite sure how that happened but I'm not about to tempt fate twice!

I have to be honest in that I am very glad the scale showed a loss. While I had prepared myself for a nasty gain, if I had gained I think it would have been harder to get myself back into better eating. While I still don't feel 100% and taking the trash can out the curb makes me winded, I really needed this loss. It makes me want to get back to healthy eating and tracking. I want to continue to see the scale move down and I plan to ramp up the APs as soon as I am feeling better. 

I hope that comes sooner rather than later!

Vacation Then vs Now

Since returning home from our mini-vacation to Las Vegas I wanted to write my thoughts on vacations then vs now. Despite seeing a gain on my home scale when we returned from vacation, I was really pleased with how I navigated my food, drinks, and desserts. As you have seen, there were many indulgences. I'm not convinced I could ever not gain on vacation. Maybe if I only ate salad but then that would be a very boring vacation!

• I really worked to control my sugar/desserts.

Prior to leaving for Las Vegas I knew I would be having cheesecake at The Cheesecake Factory. It was what we do every time we visit. Plus, I had the $50 gift card to use. Since I knew I would be having cheesecake, which is very high in PPVs, I made the conscious decision not to have desserts at most of my other meals. I didn't feel deprived either. I just simply made a choice. The first night we went to the buffet I didn't even go look at the dessert case as to not be tempted! When I had lunch the next day they sat me right by the dessert case. That is the day I took a look and decided on the piece of biscotti with my coffee.

Having dessert the evening we met up with Kenyon's aunt and uncle for dinner was a harder choice. I didn't really need dessert but I also didn't want to appear to be such a stick in the mud either. I already knew I would be having some drinks before the show later and that alone should have been my “dessert budget” for the evening. When I found the sugar free ice cream it sounded like just the right choice for an extra dessert. I was happy with my decision and I didn't look at anything else in the dessert case. Again, choices.

• My alcohol consumption was so-so and could have been better.

I am a social drinker so alcohol has always fallen into the want category instead of the need category. I enjoy social drinking and I enjoy the taste of alcohol. I had planned to use two drink coupons on my flight but had already started to talk myself out of it. That would be 8 PPVs I would spending and did I really need to spend that many PPVs. I didn't have to use those free coupons but decided to. This thinking is similar for the 2 for 1 drinks at the hotel bar. Did I really need any drinks? And did I really need two? Of course not. Again, want vs need. And want won out every time. I guess I'll sum it up by saying, it could have been worse.

• The road trip home is probably the cleanest eating I've ever done.

I am 100% happy with how I navigated our road trip home. Being in a car for several longs hours is tough on me. We have driven to NM several times to visit my in-laws and that drive is 16 hours. I'm not very nice after 10 hours cooped up in a car. I also didn't plan any snacks for this drive, which is something I don't usually do. There just wasn't an opportunity to really stop at a store and I didn't need to buy in a bunch of snack stuff either. So we just decided to wing it.

I really had to rely on my hunger signals. Even though we would pass food signs along the freeway or have a quick stop at the gas stations/truck stops, I knew I wasn't hungry and so I didn't need to buy anything to munch on. I drink a lot of gas station coffee mixed with flavored cappuccino and that helped keep the sugar craving at bay. I bought a caramel Cadbury egg after my Costa Vida lunch. When the next sugar craving hit but I didn't want more coffee I bought a fruit cup from the truck stop. This cost $2.99 but was money well spent.

• Choosing the freeway route, while longer, had more restaurant options.

We had two routes we could drive home and we chose the longer freeway route for more stops. That in itself was great. When we drove to/from our Reno trip earlier this year, our food options were so limited that when we did stop for dinner it wasn't the best choices. I was so happy to find a Costa Vida along our trip. When dinner rolled around I knew the Arby's was up ahead and I really like the Market Fresh sandwiches. I was really happy with our food stops along our drive home.

Although I gained some weight on this mini-vacation, it wasn't nearly the amount I gained in Hawaii. So I'll consider this a win.

Anchor Island Novels by Terri Osburn

I just finished reading a really great book trilogy that I wanted to share with you all.  I am a hopeless romantic at heart and I love the books where boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in love, boy and girl break up, and just when you think it might not end well, boy and girl live happily ever after.  Yep, hopeless romantic at heart!

Throw in some good between-the-sheets-action and I’m a happy camper when it comes to romance novels.  It is rare to find a good book that I just can’t put down.  This series is just that though and you won’t want to put the books down.

I found the Anchor Island Novel series on Amazon.  The first book came up on the $1.99 Amazon romance book list and I purchased it. 

I sought out the second one as soon as I finished the first one.  I love when I read a series of books that have already been written so I don’t have to wait!  However, I did have to wait for the third book.

Somehow I was able to partake in an early read of this third book if I joined some sort of free Amazon Kindle Club.  Hey, works for me.  I just wanted to read this third book.  I had become quite invested in the characters.  I think the third book was my favorite and I just couldn’t put it down. 

The Anchor Island Novel series follows six main characters: Beth, Lucas, Joe, Sid, Randy, and Will.  There are also many colorful characters throughout the book.  The chemistry between each couple is really what makes this series so great.  The friendship that develops between the women also makes my heart happy.

If you are looking for a fun easy read that will have you hooked, you should check out Terri Osburn Anchor Island Novel series. 

I would actually love to see this series continue but not with new supporting characters.  I want to know what happens to these six main characters I’ve invested so much time in.  I hate sometimes when good books have to come to an end.

Last Week's Super Activity

I had a great week of activity last week.  This was partly due to the sunshine and the opportunity to walk a lot.  I also reaped the benefits of my Sunday walking in Las Vegas before my FitBit week ended.  There was a lot of walking in Vegas.

Last week’s FitBit totals: 105,569 steps and 47.71 miles.  I actually surpassed my WW friend Regina for first place, if only for a day last week.  It was fun to be the leader for a short time.  I walked about 15 more miles than my usual FitBit totals so that really made me happy.

I didn’t wear my HRM this week and just relied on my FitBit and my steps.  I average about a 17 minute mile when I walk and often burn 100 calories per mile.  Most days I counted 1 AP per mile.

Wednesday: 4.33 mile walk and walk later in the day

I met my sister Jenny at Village Meridian and walked to/from for my APs today.  Later I met my friend Mark and we walked to/from dinner at Costa Vida downtown.  It was an easy way to get in some APs and extra activity.  6 APs earned.

 

Thursday: 1.5 mile walk in the foothills

I had planned to take today as a rest day after all my walking on Wednesday and a bit of soreness in my hips/back.  I then got a call from my friend Janet, whom I was meeting later for dinner and a movie, to go for a hike in the foothills with her dog.  It was such a beautiful day I didn’t want to pass up the chance.  1 AP earned.

Friday: 4 mile walk

Plans today included meeting my mom, nieces, and brother at SouperSalad.  I was pretty tired after work and really considered a nap.  I had skipped my 3:30am workout with the plan to walk to/from SouperSalad.  It took some serious talking to myself to get me out the door on foot.  I was really considering driving.  I even thought I might bum a ride home with my Mom but she didn’t offer.  I took that as a sign I needed to walk back home.  I made an agreement with myself that I would take Saturday as a rest day and not get up at 3:30am either.  4 APs earned.
 

Saturday: Much needed rest day

No 3:30am wakeup call and no activity after work.  My Aunt Barb was in town from Colorado so I went out to my parent’s house for dinner.

 

Sunday: 3.1 miles on the treadmill, walking in the airport, and walking in Vegas

I started my morning of travel with a walk on the treadmill.  I had time to kill at the airport so I did a few laps around the terminal.  Finally, when we got checked into our hotel we took the shuttle to the Strip and walked.  By the end of the day my FitBit logged 24,811 steps and 11.5 miles.  4 APs earned for my treadmill walk.  I didn’t really track  my APs after I got to Vegas.

Monday: Vegas walking

FitBit showed 17,678 steps and 7.66 miles. 

Tuesday: Vegas walking

FitBit showed 20,348 steps and 8.77 miles.  I actually had to walk a few laps in the hotel hallway to get to 20,000 steps as I was very close at the end of the day.

 

With all this walking in Vegas I am now confident of my 12K coming up in two weeks.  I’m meeting Dawny in Spokane to finally meet in person and walk the Bloomsday 12K.  It will have hills but I can do it!